You might be a liberal if!

* You might be a Liberal if, You blame the oil companies for high gas prices, but believe in doing everything humanly possible to keep them from drilling for more oil.
* You might be a Liberal if, You'd have no problem with a Democratic President talking with Mahmoud Ahmadinejad or Kim Jung-Il without conditions, but would be very upset if he started seriously negotiating with Republicans over national security or energy issues.
*You might be a Liberal if, You don't see a conflict between "supporting the troops" and trying to insure that they lose the war that they're fighting.
* You might be a Liberal if, You think the solution to an underperforming economy is higher taxes, more regulations, and publicly attacking businesses, but don't understand how that relates to the phrase, "The beatings will continue until morale improves."
* You might be a Liberal if, You're surprised that people don't think you're patriotic just because you were photographed not holding your hand over your heart during the national anthem and made a big deal out of refusing to wear a flag pin.
* You might be a Liberal if, You tell everyone who'll listen that Bush is "worse than Hitler" and that Republicans are fascists, but you never stop to consider that if that were true, you'd be dead or in a gulag already.
* You might be a Liberal if, You think Christmas songs at school plays shouldn't be allowed because they might offend people who don't believe, but don't understand what the problem is supposed to be with government funded "art" that defiles Christianity.
* You might be a Liberal if, Your idea of "reparations for slavery" is white people who have never owned slaves giving money to black people who were never slaves, more than a hundred years after slavery ended.
*You might be a Liberal if, You "assure us that deterrence will work, but when the time comes to deter, (you're) against it." -- Ann Coulter
* You might be a Liberal if, You think celebrities are just exercising their right to free speech when they criticize conservatives, but believe that the celebs are having their First Amendment rights abridged if anyone criticizes them for their comments.
* You might be a Liberal if, You called George Bush, "George Herbert Walker Bush," and George Allen, "George Felix Allen," but think someone referring to Barack Obama as "Barack Hussein Obama" is a racist.
*You might be a Liberal if, You think we should give condoms to thirteen year-olds because "they're going to do it anyway," but feel that we can get rid of every gun held by criminals in the U.S. simply by making them illegal.
*You might be a Liberal if, You think Anita Hill was telling the truth about Clarence Thomas, but Gennifer Flowers, Paula Jones, Linda Tripp, Dolly Kyle Browning, Sally Perdue, Kathleen Willey, and Juanita Broaddrick -- among many others -- are all lying about the Clintons.
*You might be a Liberal if, You "are willing to do whatever it takes to defend the American public from terrorists...as long as the French and Germans say it's OK."
* You might be a Liberal if, You continually claim that we don't do enough for the poor, but you want to add 12-20 million more of them to the ranks by giving illegal aliens American citizenship.
* You might be a Liberal if, You blame "society" for creating the conditions that turn people into criminals, but you don't think that gives "society" even more of a moral obligation to lock those criminals away so that they won't hurt innocent people.
* You might be a Liberal if,There's a conflict between America and any other country, over just about any topic, and you're more likely to side with the other nation than your own.
* You might be a Liberal if, You believe that fanatical Muslims who want to fly planes into our skyscrapers aren't a serious threat to the U.S., but Christians are.
* You might be a Liberal if, You think we can improve our health care system by putting the same government that brought us FEMA, ICE, Airport Security, and the IRS in charge of it.
* You might be a Liberal if, You believe that conservative criticism of Barack Obama's abilities is primarily driven by racism, but actual race-based criticism leveled at Clarence Thomas, Michelle Malkin, and Condi Rice by liberals obviously has nothing to do with race.
* You might be a Liberal if, You live in a great and free nation like America and can use phrases like "audacity of hope" or "speaking the truth to power" without the slightest hint of irony.
* You might be a Liberal if, You say, "Why do they hate us?" when America is attacked and "we're just furthering the cycle of violence" when we retaliate.
* You might be a Liberal if, You generally mean "threatening to the interests of the Democratic Party" or "Jesse Jackson or Al Sharpton needs some more money" when you use the word "racist."
*You might be a Liberal if, Your first thought after hearing that someone who publicly criticized murderers actually murdered someone himself is, "What a hypocrite!"
*You might be a Liberal if, You tell anyone who'll listen that our elections are fraudulent and then you fight tooth and nail to prevent states from requiring a photo ID to vote.