Monday, August 25, 2008
Little Alex
One Sunday morning, the pastor noticed little Alex standing in the foyer of the church staring up at a large plaque. It was covered with names and small American flags mounted on either side of it. The six-year old had been staring at the plaque for some time, so the pastor walked up, stood beside the little boy, and said quietly, 'Good morning, Alex.' 'Good morning Pastor,' he replied, still focused on the plaque. 'Pastor, what is this?' The pastor said, 'Well son, it's a memorial to all the young men and women who died in the service.' Soberly, they just stood together, staring at the large plaque. Finally, little Alex's voice, barely audible and trembling with fear asked, 'Which service, the 8:30 or the 10:45?
Friday, August 22, 2008
You might be a liberal if!
* You might be a Liberal if, You blame the oil companies for high gas prices, but believe in doing everything humanly possible to keep them from drilling for more oil.
* You might be a Liberal if, You'd have no problem with a Democratic President talking with Mahmoud Ahmadinejad or Kim Jung-Il without conditions, but would be very upset if he started seriously negotiating with Republicans over national security or energy issues.
*You might be a Liberal if, You don't see a conflict between "supporting the troops" and trying to insure that they lose the war that they're fighting.
* You might be a Liberal if, You think the solution to an underperforming economy is higher taxes, more regulations, and publicly attacking businesses, but don't understand how that relates to the phrase, "The beatings will continue until morale improves."
* You might be a Liberal if, You're surprised that people don't think you're patriotic just because you were photographed not holding your hand over your heart during the national anthem and made a big deal out of refusing to wear a flag pin.
* You might be a Liberal if, You tell everyone who'll listen that Bush is "worse than Hitler" and that Republicans are fascists, but you never stop to consider that if that were true, you'd be dead or in a gulag already.
* You might be a Liberal if, You think Christmas songs at school plays shouldn't be allowed because they might offend people who don't believe, but don't understand what the problem is supposed to be with government funded "art" that defiles Christianity.
* You might be a Liberal if, Your idea of "reparations for slavery" is white people who have never owned slaves giving money to black people who were never slaves, more than a hundred years after slavery ended.
*You might be a Liberal if, You "assure us that deterrence will work, but when the time comes to deter, (you're) against it." -- Ann Coulter
* You might be a Liberal if, You think celebrities are just exercising their right to free speech when they criticize conservatives, but believe that the celebs are having their First Amendment rights abridged if anyone criticizes them for their comments.
* You might be a Liberal if, You called George Bush, "George Herbert Walker Bush," and George Allen, "George Felix Allen," but think someone referring to Barack Obama as "Barack Hussein Obama" is a racist.
*You might be a Liberal if, You think we should give condoms to thirteen year-olds because "they're going to do it anyway," but feel that we can get rid of every gun held by criminals in the U.S. simply by making them illegal.
*You might be a Liberal if, You think Anita Hill was telling the truth about Clarence Thomas, but Gennifer Flowers, Paula Jones, Linda Tripp, Dolly Kyle Browning, Sally Perdue, Kathleen Willey, and Juanita Broaddrick -- among many others -- are all lying about the Clintons.
*You might be a Liberal if, You "are willing to do whatever it takes to defend the American public from terrorists...as long as the French and Germans say it's OK."
* You might be a Liberal if, You continually claim that we don't do enough for the poor, but you want to add 12-20 million more of them to the ranks by giving illegal aliens American citizenship.
* You might be a Liberal if, You blame "society" for creating the conditions that turn people into criminals, but you don't think that gives "society" even more of a moral obligation to lock those criminals away so that they won't hurt innocent people.
* You might be a Liberal if,There's a conflict between America and any other country, over just about any topic, and you're more likely to side with the other nation than your own.
* You might be a Liberal if, You believe that fanatical Muslims who want to fly planes into our skyscrapers aren't a serious threat to the U.S., but Christians are.
* You might be a Liberal if, You think we can improve our health care system by putting the same government that brought us FEMA, ICE, Airport Security, and the IRS in charge of it.
* You might be a Liberal if, You believe that conservative criticism of Barack Obama's abilities is primarily driven by racism, but actual race-based criticism leveled at Clarence Thomas, Michelle Malkin, and Condi Rice by liberals obviously has nothing to do with race.
* You might be a Liberal if, You live in a great and free nation like America and can use phrases like "audacity of hope" or "speaking the truth to power" without the slightest hint of irony.
* You might be a Liberal if, You say, "Why do they hate us?" when America is attacked and "we're just furthering the cycle of violence" when we retaliate.
* You might be a Liberal if, You generally mean "threatening to the interests of the Democratic Party" or "Jesse Jackson or Al Sharpton needs some more money" when you use the word "racist."
*You might be a Liberal if, Your first thought after hearing that someone who publicly criticized murderers actually murdered someone himself is, "What a hypocrite!"
*You might be a Liberal if, You tell anyone who'll listen that our elections are fraudulent and then you fight tooth and nail to prevent states from requiring a photo ID to vote.
* You might be a Liberal if, You'd have no problem with a Democratic President talking with Mahmoud Ahmadinejad or Kim Jung-Il without conditions, but would be very upset if he started seriously negotiating with Republicans over national security or energy issues.
*You might be a Liberal if, You don't see a conflict between "supporting the troops" and trying to insure that they lose the war that they're fighting.
* You might be a Liberal if, You think the solution to an underperforming economy is higher taxes, more regulations, and publicly attacking businesses, but don't understand how that relates to the phrase, "The beatings will continue until morale improves."
* You might be a Liberal if, You're surprised that people don't think you're patriotic just because you were photographed not holding your hand over your heart during the national anthem and made a big deal out of refusing to wear a flag pin.
* You might be a Liberal if, You tell everyone who'll listen that Bush is "worse than Hitler" and that Republicans are fascists, but you never stop to consider that if that were true, you'd be dead or in a gulag already.
* You might be a Liberal if, You think Christmas songs at school plays shouldn't be allowed because they might offend people who don't believe, but don't understand what the problem is supposed to be with government funded "art" that defiles Christianity.
* You might be a Liberal if, Your idea of "reparations for slavery" is white people who have never owned slaves giving money to black people who were never slaves, more than a hundred years after slavery ended.
*You might be a Liberal if, You "assure us that deterrence will work, but when the time comes to deter, (you're) against it." -- Ann Coulter
* You might be a Liberal if, You think celebrities are just exercising their right to free speech when they criticize conservatives, but believe that the celebs are having their First Amendment rights abridged if anyone criticizes them for their comments.
* You might be a Liberal if, You called George Bush, "George Herbert Walker Bush," and George Allen, "George Felix Allen," but think someone referring to Barack Obama as "Barack Hussein Obama" is a racist.
*You might be a Liberal if, You think we should give condoms to thirteen year-olds because "they're going to do it anyway," but feel that we can get rid of every gun held by criminals in the U.S. simply by making them illegal.
*You might be a Liberal if, You think Anita Hill was telling the truth about Clarence Thomas, but Gennifer Flowers, Paula Jones, Linda Tripp, Dolly Kyle Browning, Sally Perdue, Kathleen Willey, and Juanita Broaddrick -- among many others -- are all lying about the Clintons.
*You might be a Liberal if, You "are willing to do whatever it takes to defend the American public from terrorists...as long as the French and Germans say it's OK."
* You might be a Liberal if, You continually claim that we don't do enough for the poor, but you want to add 12-20 million more of them to the ranks by giving illegal aliens American citizenship.
* You might be a Liberal if, You blame "society" for creating the conditions that turn people into criminals, but you don't think that gives "society" even more of a moral obligation to lock those criminals away so that they won't hurt innocent people.
* You might be a Liberal if,There's a conflict between America and any other country, over just about any topic, and you're more likely to side with the other nation than your own.
* You might be a Liberal if, You believe that fanatical Muslims who want to fly planes into our skyscrapers aren't a serious threat to the U.S., but Christians are.
* You might be a Liberal if, You think we can improve our health care system by putting the same government that brought us FEMA, ICE, Airport Security, and the IRS in charge of it.
* You might be a Liberal if, You believe that conservative criticism of Barack Obama's abilities is primarily driven by racism, but actual race-based criticism leveled at Clarence Thomas, Michelle Malkin, and Condi Rice by liberals obviously has nothing to do with race.
* You might be a Liberal if, You live in a great and free nation like America and can use phrases like "audacity of hope" or "speaking the truth to power" without the slightest hint of irony.
* You might be a Liberal if, You say, "Why do they hate us?" when America is attacked and "we're just furthering the cycle of violence" when we retaliate.
* You might be a Liberal if, You generally mean "threatening to the interests of the Democratic Party" or "Jesse Jackson or Al Sharpton needs some more money" when you use the word "racist."
*You might be a Liberal if, Your first thought after hearing that someone who publicly criticized murderers actually murdered someone himself is, "What a hypocrite!"
*You might be a Liberal if, You tell anyone who'll listen that our elections are fraudulent and then you fight tooth and nail to prevent states from requiring a photo ID to vote.
Wednesday, August 20, 2008
Cardboard testimonies
I was sent an email with this you tube movie check it out it is awesome http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RvDDc5RB6FQ
Tuesday, August 12, 2008
Long cool drink of water
A friend sent me an email that made me laugh please enjoy.
German Speaking Texan
In central Texas, there is a large German-speaking population. A farmer walking down a country road notices a man drinking from his pond with his hand..The farmer shouted: 'Trink das wasser nicht. Die kuhen haben dahin gesheissen.' Which means: 'Don't drink the water, the cows have messed in it.'The man shouted back: 'I'm from New York and just down here campaigning for Obama, I can't understand you. Please speak in English.' The farmer replied:
'Use two hands, you'll get more.'
German Speaking Texan
In central Texas, there is a large German-speaking population. A farmer walking down a country road notices a man drinking from his pond with his hand..The farmer shouted: 'Trink das wasser nicht. Die kuhen haben dahin gesheissen.' Which means: 'Don't drink the water, the cows have messed in it.'The man shouted back: 'I'm from New York and just down here campaigning for Obama, I can't understand you. Please speak in English.' The farmer replied:
'Use two hands, you'll get more.'
Thursday, August 07, 2008
Retired?
Working friends frequently ask me what I do to make my retirement interesting. Well, for example,the other day I went into town to get the WallStreet Journal so I could track my investments. I was only in the store forabout 5 minutes.
When I came out, there was a cop writing out a parking ticket. I said, 'Come on, don't you have anything better to do than write a retired person a ticket? Why aren't you out chasing crooks or child molesters? He ignored me and continued writing the ticket.
I called him a 'Nazi.' He glared at me and wrote another ticket for having worn tires. So I called him 'Barney Fife'. He finished the second ticket and put it on the windshield with the first. Then he wrote a third ticket. This went on for about 20 minutes. The more I abused him, the more tickets he wrote.
Personally, I didn't care..... I came downtown on the bus. The car that he was putting the tickets on had a bumper sticker that said "Obama in 08". I try to have a little fun each day now that I'm retired. It's important to my mental health.
When I came out, there was a cop writing out a parking ticket. I said, 'Come on, don't you have anything better to do than write a retired person a ticket? Why aren't you out chasing crooks or child molesters? He ignored me and continued writing the ticket.
I called him a 'Nazi.' He glared at me and wrote another ticket for having worn tires. So I called him 'Barney Fife'. He finished the second ticket and put it on the windshield with the first. Then he wrote a third ticket. This went on for about 20 minutes. The more I abused him, the more tickets he wrote.
Personally, I didn't care..... I came downtown on the bus. The car that he was putting the tickets on had a bumper sticker that said "Obama in 08". I try to have a little fun each day now that I'm retired. It's important to my mental health.
Monday, August 04, 2008
God's power is made perfect in my weakness part II
2 Corinthians 12:9
But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me.
Recently I have had my world turned upside down with me breaking 8 ribs and going into the hospital for 5 day. I went in on a Wednesday and came out on a Sunday and think God was wanting me to see something that he was doing in the lives of Impact Cowboy Church and although that go.
I had come to the point where I had my hands on everything going on not by choice but just because I was the Pastor and felt I needed to do more than my part to show people that I am a loving and concerned pastor that cares for his flock and is not scared to get in and work right along side of them. I was becoming a workaholic without even knowing it.
When the accident happened I could not be there to make sure everything was going on as normal which really bothered me, but here is the thing that really showed me a fresh new look at God caring for me. People started rising up and taking on things that my wife and I normally did and did a great job at it. Others took up the teaching slack for me, Rex, Keith, and Billy. Darlene started organizing meals for us and I am sure took care of getting the church sanctuary ready.
Here is what I figured out God don't need strong people because if he did he would have been on Goliath's side and all the Giants that are mentioned in the Bible. He would have used the mightiest warriors to win the battles. The Romans would have been the people to continue the work of the Lord.
But the truth is that God did not want those people, he took people that were discouraged, in dept, wounded, depressed and made them in to the mighty men of Israel. God wants to find the least of the least and raise them up to display his Glory. I guess in my shape God is getting some Glory because I am having to rely on his grace.
Our church has been growing steadily this last Sunday 83 people there. God is good just always look to God and know that if it is too big for you to do it is just the right size for God.
But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me.
Recently I have had my world turned upside down with me breaking 8 ribs and going into the hospital for 5 day. I went in on a Wednesday and came out on a Sunday and think God was wanting me to see something that he was doing in the lives of Impact Cowboy Church and although that go.
I had come to the point where I had my hands on everything going on not by choice but just because I was the Pastor and felt I needed to do more than my part to show people that I am a loving and concerned pastor that cares for his flock and is not scared to get in and work right along side of them. I was becoming a workaholic without even knowing it.
When the accident happened I could not be there to make sure everything was going on as normal which really bothered me, but here is the thing that really showed me a fresh new look at God caring for me. People started rising up and taking on things that my wife and I normally did and did a great job at it. Others took up the teaching slack for me, Rex, Keith, and Billy. Darlene started organizing meals for us and I am sure took care of getting the church sanctuary ready.
Here is what I figured out God don't need strong people because if he did he would have been on Goliath's side and all the Giants that are mentioned in the Bible. He would have used the mightiest warriors to win the battles. The Romans would have been the people to continue the work of the Lord.
But the truth is that God did not want those people, he took people that were discouraged, in dept, wounded, depressed and made them in to the mighty men of Israel. God wants to find the least of the least and raise them up to display his Glory. I guess in my shape God is getting some Glory because I am having to rely on his grace.
Our church has been growing steadily this last Sunday 83 people there. God is good just always look to God and know that if it is too big for you to do it is just the right size for God.
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